Now where did I leave off….

Oh yes!  I remember now!  I was just beginning to divulge my entire childhood/teenage/twenty-something life experiences with the entire world.  It must have slipped my neurotic mind…

But fear not, my darlings, for your favorite neurotic blonde is back!  *And obviously with a touch of amour-propre…  I assure you I am not conceited.  I’m just merely delusional.*

As you might have noticed, I ventured a little too far from my creative path.  The ultimate distraction was my chaotic transition from two bartending jobs to a regular 9-5 career.  In my mind, I would gracefully retire my role as libations aficionado and slide easily into a comfy executive chair at my new “big girl job”.  Yeah.  Well, it turns out my mind operates a little differently than reality.  My mind is an asshole.  In reality, I tripped clumsily out of two bars (as did most of my patrons after visiting me) and fell into an extremely hideous and annoyingly painful recycled desk chair.  That damned chair caused me so much back pain I thought I had a kidney infection.  No kidding.  I convinced myself I had a kidney infection.  I spent a total of five minutes perusing WebMD and Google searches and, well, my ailment was incontestable (as I often believe I am all-knowing of things which I know nothing about).  I made my boyfriend buy me 100%, all natural cranberry juice.  It was $10.  The next morning at work – with my kidneys feeling quite refreshed – I sat down in my chair and began to feel the dull pain creeping into my back.  “AH HA!  It’s the chair!”  Turns out that a nice, new leather chair was just what I needed to cure my “kidney infection”.  Unfortunately for me, my boyfriend expects me to drink every last drop of that $10 cranberry juice.  *blech!*  Have you ever tasted that shit?  Dilute it all you want, but it will still make your mouth pucker.

But, I digress….

After I finally settled into a new routine I started writing again.  As I was writing what I thought would be my next entry, I was yet again distracted by the realization that I wasn’t happy with it.  By it, I don’t just mean the entry, but my blog overall.  Writing was satisfying enough, but The Neurotic Blonde was taking a shape that didn’t quite fit the image in my head.  So, I just stopped.  I kept thinking, “I need to pick this up again” or “just sit down and figure it out”, but I didn’t.  I kind of lost the motivation.

Recently, however, due to shear lack of boredom at work I logged onto WordPress.  * I didn’t think anything could be more boring than sitting in a cubicle…until I had to shop for cubicles whilst sitting in a cubicle.*  As I started catching up on the blogs I follow, I couldn’t help the irresistible urge to write.  Reading about everyone’s summer adventures, and how-to do this, and why I should wear that, and what trendy new “superfood” will make you lose 10 pounds in five days…  I just felt that somewhere in this world – or world wide web – there is a place for my zany thoughts.

So to make a long story short (too late), I think I have a renewed sense of direction for my blog.  You’re going to see some changes, and what you’ll be reading will mostly be opinions, ramblings, and rants, but I think it will be a better blog overall.  Besides, aren’t most people’s blogs just opinions, ramblings, and rants?

So give me a minute, sweeties, while I clean this mess up a bit…

Xoxo

Heidi

P.S. – For those of you who actually enjoy the stories of my past, they will NOT be going anywhere.  I plan to do a “throwback” of some sort where I recall a funny, neurotic moment from my past(if only to humor myself in the end).  But believe me…  I haven’t even gotten to the really good stuff yet!

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